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Friday, June 6, 2014

REASONS NOT TO MESS UP WITH CHILDREN- BY ZOORJEE!!!

(Thanks Zoorjee thanks. We can again laugh!!)
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said,
"When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked,
"What if Jonah went to hell?
"The little girl replied,"

Then you ask him. "
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A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten commandments with her five and six year olds.

After explaining the commandments to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother,
she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat out brothers and sisters?. Without missing a beat one little boy answered,
"Thou shall not kill
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One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink.

She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked!
"Why are some of your hair white Mom"?
Her mother replied,
"Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said,
"Momma how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white ?"
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The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.

"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say,
"There is Jennifer, she's a lawyer,
OR "That's Michael, He's a doctor.!
A small voice at the back of the room rang out,
"And there's the teacher, she is dead!
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The teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.

Trying to make the matter clearer, she said
"Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.
"Yes." the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?
A little fellow shouted.
"Cause your feet are not empty."
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The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.

At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "
"Take only ONE, God is watching."
Moving further along he lunch line,at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note,
"Take all you want,God is watching the apple."
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Zoorjee

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